Stories from Kentucky

The owner of a golf course in Kentucky was confused about paying an
invoice, so he decided to ask his secretary for some mathematical help.

He called her into his office and said, “You graduated from the
University of Kentucky and I need some help. If I were to give you $20,000,
minus 14%, how much would you take off?”

The secretary thought a moment, then replied, “Everything but my
earrings.” ================

A group of Kentucky friends went deer hunting and paired off in twos
for the day. That night, one of the hunters returned alone, staggering under
the weight of an eight-point buck.

“Where’s Bubba?” the others ask ed.

“Bubba had a stroke of some kind. He’s a couple of miles back up the
trail,” the successful hunter replied.

“You left Bubba laying out there and carried the deer back?” they
inquired.

“A tough call,” nodded the hunter. “But I figured no one is going to
steal Bubba!”

=================

Regarding the year 2000, a senior at U of K was overheard saying,
“when the end of the world comes, I hope to be in Kentucky.” When asked why,
he stated that everything happens here 20 years later than the rest of the
civilized world.

=================

The young Kentuckian came running into the store and said to his
buddy, “Bubba, somebody just stole your pickup truck from the parking lot!”

Bubba replied, “Did you see who it was?”

The young Kentuckian answered, “I couldn’t tell, but I got the
license number.”

=================

NEWS FLASH! – Lexington, KY —– Kentucky’s worst air disaster o
ccurred when a small two-seater Cessna 150 plane, piloted by two University
of Kentucky students, crashed into a cemetery earlier today in Lexington.

Kentucky search and rescue workers have recovered 300 bodies so far
and expect the number to climb as digging continues into the evening. The
pilot and copilot survived and are helping in the recovery efforts.

=================
A Kentucky State trooper pulled over a pickup on I-71. The trooper
asked, “Got any ID?”

Bubba replied, “Bout whut? Subbmitted by classmate via e-mail
Author: harold

Daily Muslin Wisdom

When Moses conversed with God, he asked, “Lord, where shall I seek You?”

God answered, “Among the brokenhearted.”

Moses continued, “But, Lord, no heart could be more despairing than mine.”

And God replied, “Then I am where you are.”
-Abu’l-Fayd al-Misri, “The Kashf al-Mahjub”

From “The Bounty of Allah,” translated by Aneela Khalid Arshed. Copyright 1999. All rights reserved. Used with permission of The Crossroad Publishing Company, New York.
Author: harold